Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Randomize
