hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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