Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
It's no shave November. This is our time.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Randomize
