if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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