I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
operation have a gay friend backfired
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
