yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
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