He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Someone came in the potted fern
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
