do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize