I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Randomize
