i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
