butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Randomize
