Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize
