How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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