My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
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