Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
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