P.S. I can't hear my feet
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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