guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
