Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
