North Korea, Best Korea!
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
Randomize
