she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize
