LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I need water and some morals
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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