my phone needs a breathalizer
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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