Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
The best revenge is premature balding
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Randomize
