Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
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