Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
