So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
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