I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
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