remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Randomize
