Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
The feeling are messing with the penis
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
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