I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize
