I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
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