is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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