Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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