using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
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