It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
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