i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
