Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize