As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
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