Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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