got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
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