question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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