I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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