why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize