Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize
