It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize