you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
Randomize