Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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