I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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