CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
