I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
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