she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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