pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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